a sunday drawing + poem
Here is to creating and sharing for the sake of it - and reminding myself I know how to, that I am brave enough to and that I love to do it!
Sunday, January 22
I wonder if words have an expiration date
If they sit inside of you for decades, months, days and they decide to spoil in protest.
I wonder if I am vain for wanting to speak and for wanting to be told that my words are beautiful.
The words inside me feel unsettled at the idea of becoming an Instagram PowerPoint in sans serif font and begin to curdle
I have a black spot on my tongue and my mother says people should be careful with me because it is the marker of someone who can spin reality with their words. She says I have had it since I was born, but I am convinced it is a burn mark.
Have you ever been rocked into stillness because you’re not certain what it is that you want to move towards – a type of stillness that masks as wisdom –
but when you look closely you can see the fear trying to worm its way out –
and when you lean in you can hear the fear whisper, please just take a chance instead of suffocating me and maybe I can create something honest instead of beautiful.
It can feel so hard to create after the end of a project. It can feel so hard to create art period. Then comes the pressure of feeling like people are waiting on something, or worry that whatever I will and want to share won’t resonate. Or even worse than external pressure comes the internal confusion of not knowing what I want to create right now or not having a singular project to dedicate my time and attention to!
I’m trying to remind myself that this is a beautiful place to be; the place where I’m excited to create for the sake of creating without an end goal or deadline. That this is the place my creative spirit is this happiest.
Hope that you make the time to create today.
With all my love,
Debs